A genetic Am uh ree kuh o' d future.
Work with folks from all over.
Muh hood was diverse when I moved in, pert near ten years ago.
Lotta Indians moving in; of the reservation continent India.
Not necessarily a bad thing; my next door neighbor is an awesome human being.
But it precipitated a thought that by the time my kids retire, this changing
country will further morph.
And so, genetically thinking into the future, the oft-used term
"Caucasian-American", will lose its prominence in vocabulary and journalism.
Folks, we will soon be and as we are soon becoming, if not already, we are:
Blackasiandiahonkey
Redyellowblacknwhitey
CrackerNawordasian
AfricanasiaNancaucasianAmerican
Slimjewstian
Icouldgoonandonadinfinitum
Ciao 4 now; gotta go bro.
the Pigmon
Showing posts with label Voice of the Pigman. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Voice of the Pigman. Show all posts
Tuesday, December 14, 2010
Thursday, November 25, 2010
Pigman talks The Weepies, Deb Talan, Steve Tannen and theDecemberists/REM Connection
Is it me, or does the guitars in the new Decemberists hit sound like REM?
Mash up the Decemberist's "Down by the Water" with REM's "The One I Love".
Saw the Weepies live last Wednesday night down in Little Five Points; Been a
big fan for a couple of years. Very cool and laidback show. Imagine seeing a
band at the Vogue Theatre.
Ciao main.
Mash up the Decemberist's "Down by the Water" with REM's "The One I Love".
Saw the Weepies live last Wednesday night down in Little Five Points; Been a
big fan for a couple of years. Very cool and laidback show. Imagine seeing a
band at the Vogue Theatre.
Ciao main.
Labels:
Indie,
Music,
The Decemberists,
The Weepies,
Voice of the Pigman
Thursday, December 31, 2009
Time for a New Year's Revolution

Ever seen it?
The show called, "The Biggest Loser"?
You know, they say the word, B.U.F.F.E.T (not as in Jimmy, or Warren), 'butt' ..the word, "buffet", stands for the following, of which this show has many: Big Ugly Fat Folks Eating Together.
And you probably thought that was a nmenonic device for spelling the word correctly.
Harsh, huh?
Yeah, perhaps.
Hey, I grew up skinny - with a Chicken Chest deformity.
Saw it in two Uncles; creative bastiges and heroic to me: Simeon and younger the Barry (my Mother's only two brothers).
Just waiting on the Heart Attack my mother never told me would happen. In time.
Always freaked out about everything I did; always told me to be careful, worried about my heart....just never alluded to or mentioned that IT will happen. And, so the precautionary mothering kinda helped for me.
But IT....Happened to my to two older bros.
Two normal and healthy fokkers.
Yet, I still have the pup-tent Chicken Chest, accompanied by man teats and a beer belly. Neither of which my bros have.
What an ugly way to say: "Thank GOT for DNA".
Thank GOT for Seinfeld and the manzeer.
Which they don't sell at Kohl's, danggitt.
Yessir: Moi identifies with the heavy dudes up there on the scale on TBL.
So, I'm used to it. The abuse, that is. From others; and selfish 'miner' that I 'is'.
Palpitations.
How is that, one questions: Well, of course, I have a wife and two kids.
That's me, aka, the beneficiary of leftovers and no real time to myself to exercise.
Great excuse; I'm just lazy.
I'm my own coach.
Mental quote: "Sprint to the fridge, beotch"!
The above = workout.
Hence, the beer belly.
Which I prefer to call that trophy is "Travel-Bling"....from many, and much needed, 'inexpensive stay-cations'.
So, out of that 40 some plus/year experience, as a skinny punk, then fatter fella, husband and dad.... I developed empathy and compassion.
After and during which, I gained weight.
So much so that I was up to about 215 + lbs and managed to get down to about 190 with many more LBS to 'big lose'.
Its always a fight.
The real thrilla - over vanilla wafers.
And Pringles....and singles of Stax....my fave.
That sheit will clog your arteries.
Including that main vein.
The Vena Cava......and, the Vena pointa towardza Vuh Gina.
Be very careful.
Dern soap makers turned tuber uber-extraordinaire$.
But, the real-meal ticket to more weight loss is two other complimentatry words: Friggin' Excercise.
Think and stink 'till your pink
.
For me, that's painful (literally).
So that one word, excercise, is truly is a catch 22.
If you can not exercise, because of pain, you can't lose the weight.
But you C.I.L.L. the pain, with weight gaining substances.
Liquid bread in a can!
It has been said, "Man can not live on bread alone".
This is true.
He must have at least a few more loaves (Bread(s) in a can....glass, or bottle).
And so it becomes, truly, a daily battle of mind over matter, if not a war.....and a fire fight in between.
Speaking of 'witch':
Ever tried Sriracha sauce (the Rooster)?
That's another story entirely.
Highly recommended sauce.
Twice burner; lovely.
Yet, please.....recall that ancient adage, Easy come, easy go?
Entire...complete....Bull SHEET....iimprecise - Horse Hockey.
But, here's the deal.
In re the T. V. show, "The Biggest Loser", instead of having these good humans 'doing the tread mill', and or other silly calorie burning gameativities, why don't they select a Golf Course, preferably in the AZ desert, where its hotter than hurl, and give them each - a rotary push mower - and have them.....sprint.....push.....mow..... incessantly, hours on end, all Marine-like, in order to burn off the weight?
Folks, given the current economic conditions, Golf courses are hurtin' more than these overweitghters.
All courtesy of the Bush Administration.
Evil Big Oil gluttonouss and WWI an WWII, current wars, irresponsible and certainly Hell-bound bastards of a family....but I digress.
May they continue to have a pox upon their familial house for 7 generations.
Mother Fokkers.
Back to the point.
Think about it: BUFF, out on the golf course.....with Hooters girls serving as Beer Wenches to entice the heavy straight dudes.
And banana-hammocked pool boys, 'pour' boys, serving 'whine' coolers - to entice the heavier chicks - and 'otherwise interested'. Hey I don't judge here. DNA is DNA.
While we're at it, here's another idea: Quit freaking eating!
"How"; i hear u AXE-ing? And, is that a 'werd', Alex?
Is anybody still reading- or pist off- yet?
That is th goal here, Thinker's!
Yeah, quit eating.
How......Via a medically induced coma - for 40 days.
Say WHAUUUT?
American BUF Folks love pills; how about a 40 day chill pill?
Acutally, if you project plan this, it would initially require a morning evacuation, insertion of a drip line, yada yada yada....bed, 24 hour scientific watch, documented on paper and film, etc. Nurses to excercise your limbs, Johnson/Matilda, etc. U GIT IT. We ALL have so much to learn as humans.
So...Yip, 40 days.
And: No Sweat.
Kinda llike Hey Zeus did in the desert -only he had courage.
Actually, I'd prefer the record to reflect how I really feel and that is the 'man' had balls; but I have too much respect for the dude saving my/our ashes. Plus, back in the day, balls were common.....just written about differently.
And so this proposed T.V. show takes no courage. Just a cash infusion. Which would generate cash infusion into our economy, with advertising, like always, being the catalyst.
The results of the weight-loss-coma? The awakening. Fliming would be pre, duing, and post. Then, put the newly thinned in some Teva's, banana hammock or bikini, new suit/dresses.....no excercise at all. Can you imagine? EZ Weight loss miracle. Fashion and Avertising sales. Plus the medicine takes on a new specialty. Yeah, it takes 40 days...but you slept through it and still lost weight. Here's the trophy: Man tits for the bros and no tits for the women.
Perhaps thee actual ticket to economic recovery, right there folks. If not, take a vacation at your nearest LOCAL Brewer. Mine is Sweetwater and Terrapin (Athens, GA).
I like the golf course mowing scenario better though.
Scratch and sniff T.V.
Hey, how did Phil Mickelson lose his man tits?
Maybe I need to take out a loan and purchase a membership the Atlanta Athletic Club.
Nah, I need a vacation.
the Pigman
Sunday, December 27, 2009
The Pigman Takes on Tiger
Can Tiger Woods 'Survive' the Mass Hysteria? Read More for the Full Scoop
Originally uploaded by Melissa_Blonde
TW's wife is and was hot. A gem in most men's eye, right or left.......testicle too. For a total stud like TW, aka TVV, it is simply put.... never enough.. Can never get enough. Man can not live on bread alone....and he makes alot of dough. So it ain't all about the greens and the green greens. There is that smell in the rough. And so it goes that when you are a Rock Star, defined as a traveling musician, athlete, or even a corporate salesman/engineer, etc.....and heterosexual....your body demands more than gatorade, which he could do commrrcials for the new flavor called, Tiger's Select Pussy Flavor and body rejuvinator...."providing one with the prowess to make that .....hole in one"
Ah, the dining schedule of said Rock Star: Poontang for breakfast, uh, shum Pussay for lunch, and, guess what.....hot steaming fresh pussy for dinner....and all the pussay, defined as Snack-algesic....you can stand...in one day, dammintt. Daily, 24/7x 365.....until now....DOH!
Ergo, on a diet like that.......YOU HAVE NO BUSINESS BEING MARRIED!
UNLESS.....unless you have an understanding and a written agreement with said spouse. An arrangement, spousal agreement pertaining to all things procreational and matrimonial, the benefits being Vegas-like, in that what happens on the tour stays on the tour. Only TMZ got in the way and frocked it up for every swinging dick with a card and bag of testosteronic clubs.
I submit TW has that arrangement, understood and well documented..
SO this is Christmas......and this is damage control.
And the man who brought Thanks Giving and Christmas and many a Happy New year to the PGA......must finally rest his 10'' iron wood.
Ciao main.
Bebo
Saturday, June 27, 2009
The Pigman talks Decemberists, etc. and is CRAZY FROM THE HEAT!
O.K., it's hotter than a Spanish Bull's balls out there right now; and the Bermuda's lovin' it. But the Bluegrass is spent. I'm just trying to stay Kool, in the home 'orfice'.
And so I'm takin' in the latest CD from PASTE Magazine from here in Decatur. If you don' t know about PASTE, you should. Please take the opportunity and check out the following linky: www.pastemagazine.com/subscribe
Note: I get nada for this. For me, it's like turning someone on to another good band, like my bro Michael did for me with this mag/link. Trust me, if you dig in, you'll dig it. Speakin' of which, got to see the Decemberists at the Tabernacle a couple of weeks ago. Incredible. "Fore" words and a period: The Hazards of Love.
"Blind Pilot", Phreakin' Wrocketed!!! They were great; Fore tee five minutes of just cool shtuff. Very impressive. The Decemberists will blow your pea brain if you have hazard enough love. Incrdible show. I just don't know how folks, back in the day, sat in their Sunday best, sweatin' they assh off and never once said, GOT Damn, it aint nuttin' but HAWT in heuha!
When I moved here, I was big fan of CMJ and SPIN (b/c you get free CD's with the purchase price). PASTE is cool.
Speaking of cool, from Decatur, besides Eddie's Attic, and the several pour pubs, I get the XNL emails straight outta the 'ville (Kudos for keepin' the love flowin' and keepin' Louisville wierd); and so I saw where there was to be an in-store show by The Indigo Girls, from here in Decatur...I thought, WOW. What an opportunity. They don't do that all the time. Well, maybe. Just not enough, dammit. We've seen them inumerable times. Everytime: Incredible show, and special to be there. I once got nervous in NYC, circa Jan. 1986, Chinatown, when me and my friend were the only caucasians and darkness was chompin' at the bit tyass I had back then. Same feeling at one of their shows; only no worries. Plus, they always share the stage with the best local talent; and they are incredible! Kinda like Ed Rowland does at Eddie's Attic every December.
Speakin' of foresekins, and 'beards" (think Vuh Jay J).....what the hurl is Cat Stevens doing putting out 'another' album/CD? Did not he 'fore' give that 'sheit' up, many moons ago? And, how does his current and long-embraced gig condone/accept this 'music'?
Speakin' of Brits who have been around for many moons (dark side, or other), these 'cats' may be on their 14th record.....but if you are into Pink Floyd, you'll love Porcupine Tree. Very Phloydinal. Recreational users take note. You will likey.
Ciao for now.
Bebo Pigmon
And so I'm takin' in the latest CD from PASTE Magazine from here in Decatur. If you don' t know about PASTE, you should. Please take the opportunity and check out the following linky: www.pastemagazine.com/subscribe
Note: I get nada for this. For me, it's like turning someone on to another good band, like my bro Michael did for me with this mag/link. Trust me, if you dig in, you'll dig it. Speakin' of which, got to see the Decemberists at the Tabernacle a couple of weeks ago. Incredible. "Fore" words and a period: The Hazards of Love.
"Blind Pilot", Phreakin' Wrocketed!!! They were great; Fore tee five minutes of just cool shtuff. Very impressive. The Decemberists will blow your pea brain if you have hazard enough love. Incrdible show. I just don't know how folks, back in the day, sat in their Sunday best, sweatin' they assh off and never once said, GOT Damn, it aint nuttin' but HAWT in heuha!
When I moved here, I was big fan of CMJ and SPIN (b/c you get free CD's with the purchase price). PASTE is cool.
Speaking of cool, from Decatur, besides Eddie's Attic, and the several pour pubs, I get the XNL emails straight outta the 'ville (Kudos for keepin' the love flowin' and keepin' Louisville wierd); and so I saw where there was to be an in-store show by The Indigo Girls, from here in Decatur...I thought, WOW. What an opportunity. They don't do that all the time. Well, maybe. Just not enough, dammit. We've seen them inumerable times. Everytime: Incredible show, and special to be there. I once got nervous in NYC, circa Jan. 1986, Chinatown, when me and my friend were the only caucasians and darkness was chompin' at the bit tyass I had back then. Same feeling at one of their shows; only no worries. Plus, they always share the stage with the best local talent; and they are incredible! Kinda like Ed Rowland does at Eddie's Attic every December.
Speakin' of foresekins, and 'beards" (think Vuh Jay J).....what the hurl is Cat Stevens doing putting out 'another' album/CD? Did not he 'fore' give that 'sheit' up, many moons ago? And, how does his current and long-embraced gig condone/accept this 'music'?
Speakin' of Brits who have been around for many moons (dark side, or other), these 'cats' may be on their 14th record.....but if you are into Pink Floyd, you'll love Porcupine Tree. Very Phloydinal. Recreational users take note. You will likey.
Ciao for now.
Bebo Pigmon
Labels:
The Decemberists,
Voice of the Pigman
Sunday, May 17, 2009
The Pigman takes on The Kings of Leon
This new shtuff by the "Kings of Leon" is just rediculously infectious.
I mean, FOK the Swine Flu.
I can't get outta my small pea brain head, "Sex on Fire" and "Use Somebody". Which have found their way onto several mainstream stations here.
The guitars in SOF remind me of the 80's imports staples. Give it a listen, Mr. Alex Trebec. And, name that band!
The voice in both SOF and US remind me of Eddie Money from the '70's (not that I ever loved Eddie Money....I loved Eddie Munster...but that was earlier in the '70's of the '60's and Billy Munster too in the '80's when he had that "FISH HEAD" song after a long career lost in space).
We have a major avenue here, in the A. Te El, called Ponce de Leon; hence, I thought, pea brainingly that for sure "these 4 Kings are from Ponce, man".
Nope.
Says it plain as day, on "our" SPACE: Dem kangs is from the other 'Ville.
As in Nash. Which is still a good thing. Anything between here and home is on the way, relative.
And so if you look at their group photo, looks like two of 'em belong; dos are emo's.
But they must be doing something right. 91,xxx,xxx hits.
That is math ole W could not comprehend. These foks are huge already.
Yeah, that's right. It's pop music. And these Kangs is a goin' places.
Ciao main.
Bebo
I mean, FOK the Swine Flu.
I can't get outta my small pea brain head, "Sex on Fire" and "Use Somebody". Which have found their way onto several mainstream stations here.
The guitars in SOF remind me of the 80's imports staples. Give it a listen, Mr. Alex Trebec. And, name that band!
The voice in both SOF and US remind me of Eddie Money from the '70's (not that I ever loved Eddie Money....I loved Eddie Munster...but that was earlier in the '70's of the '60's and Billy Munster too in the '80's when he had that "FISH HEAD" song after a long career lost in space).
We have a major avenue here, in the A. Te El, called Ponce de Leon; hence, I thought, pea brainingly that for sure "these 4 Kings are from Ponce, man".
Nope.
Says it plain as day, on "our" SPACE: Dem kangs is from the other 'Ville.
As in Nash. Which is still a good thing. Anything between here and home is on the way, relative.
And so if you look at their group photo, looks like two of 'em belong; dos are emo's.
But they must be doing something right. 91,xxx,xxx hits.
That is math ole W could not comprehend. These foks are huge already.
Yeah, that's right. It's pop music. And these Kangs is a goin' places.
Ciao main.
Bebo
Labels:
Indie,
Kings of Leon,
Music,
Voice of the Pigman
Sunday, May 3, 2009
Flying Pig: Ten Essential Tunes for a Swine Flu Epidemic
The Swine Flu has flown, or at least it seems to have. Here is a list of tunes to load up for such an occaision:
1. Little Piggies... The Beatles
2. Little Pigs... Mucky Pup
3. War Pigs... Black Sabbath
4. Old School Pig... Tilt
5. Devils, Rats and Piggies... The Mekons
6. Pork Tornado... Pork Tornado
7. Primus... Pork Soda
8. When Pigs Fly... by local scene artists Eddie & the F@#k Munkeys
9. Smell the Bacon... Madball
10. Pigs (Take your Pick...)... Pink Floyd
Just a nice little playlist to celebrate the pig flu season and all the things it has brought us. Hope you enjoy. Where else would you find psychedelic rock and hardcore on the same playlist...
1. Little Piggies... The Beatles
2. Little Pigs... Mucky Pup
3. War Pigs... Black Sabbath
4. Old School Pig... Tilt
5. Devils, Rats and Piggies... The Mekons
6. Pork Tornado... Pork Tornado
7. Primus... Pork Soda
8. When Pigs Fly... by local scene artists Eddie & the F@#k Munkeys
9. Smell the Bacon... Madball
10. Pigs (Take your Pick...)... Pink Floyd
Just a nice little playlist to celebrate the pig flu season and all the things it has brought us. Hope you enjoy. Where else would you find psychedelic rock and hardcore on the same playlist...
Thursday, January 29, 2009
Rod Blagojevich vs. the Pigman
Two things that did NOT help his status.
First, all the same beligerent non-burka'd-bred but inbred DNA (in Bosnia/Seriba) rousing in support of this guy, Cuz's all, plastering support of his beligerence in the states media. Although it was fun to read, it was obvious that them, his cuz's being there - not here in the USA - both brought crap publicity to Illinois, and certainly could not help. Well, it did help in my mind in that it made me think - the guy has a great name in ROD (as in hard one) and BLOW ME is somewhere in the pronunciation of his last name.
Second, the grand standing, and the self-aggrandizing - on all major media outlets - probably encouraged by counsel - was nothing short of kiss-my-ass-stupidity-I'm-on-the-way-out-anyway...... as this does not lend itself to the LOVE needed from politicians.
He may sue in a court of law.
Current lesson learned.....DO NOT PISS OFF Ill Lawmakers.
Meanwhile, he will never be governor again. Or sell insurance.
But, he is a hero is Bosnia / Serbia.....
Ciao
Bebo
First, all the same beligerent non-burka'd-bred but inbred DNA (in Bosnia/Seriba) rousing in support of this guy, Cuz's all, plastering support of his beligerence in the states media. Although it was fun to read, it was obvious that them, his cuz's being there - not here in the USA - both brought crap publicity to Illinois, and certainly could not help. Well, it did help in my mind in that it made me think - the guy has a great name in ROD (as in hard one) and BLOW ME is somewhere in the pronunciation of his last name.
Second, the grand standing, and the self-aggrandizing - on all major media outlets - probably encouraged by counsel - was nothing short of kiss-my-ass-stupidity-I'm-on-the-way-out-anyway...... as this does not lend itself to the LOVE needed from politicians.
He may sue in a court of law.
Current lesson learned.....DO NOT PISS OFF Ill Lawmakers.
Meanwhile, he will never be governor again. Or sell insurance.
But, he is a hero is Bosnia / Serbia.....
Ciao
Bebo
Labels:
Politics,
Voice of the Pigman
Sunday, October 12, 2008
Verbiage for the Bloggage
In case you missed it: Here is the Washington Post's Mensa Invitational which once again asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition..
The winners are:
1. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period of time.
2. Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an @sshole.
3. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with.
4. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.
5. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.
6. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.
7.. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.
8. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.
9. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.
10. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.
11. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease.
12. Karmageddon: It's when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, and then the Earth explodes, and it's a serious bummer.
13. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you
14. Glibido: All talk and no action.
15. Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.
16. Arachnoleptic fit (n.):The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.
17. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito, that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.
18. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a worm in the fruit you're eating.
The Washington Post has also published the winning submissions to its yearly contest, in which readers are asked to supply alternate meanings for common words.
And the winners are:
1. coffee, n. the person upon whom one coughs.
2. flabbergasted, adj.appalled by discovering how much weight one has gained.
3. abdicate, v. to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.
4. esplanade, v. to attempt an explanation while drunk.
5. willy-nilly, adj. impotent.
6. negligent, adj.absentmindedly answering the door when wearing only a nightgown.
7.. lymph, v. to walk with a lisp.
8. gargoyle, n. olive-flavored mouthwash.
9. flatulence, n. emergency vehicle that picks up someone who has been run over by a steamroller.
10. balderdash, n. a rapidly receding hairline.
11. testicle, n. a humorous question on an exam.
12. rectitude, n. the formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists.
13. pokemon, n. a Rastafarian proctologist.
14. oyster, n. a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddishisms.
15. Frisbeetarianism, n. the belief that, after death, the soul flies up onto the roof and gets stuck there.
16. circumvent, n. an opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by Jewish men.
The winners are:
1. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period of time.
2. Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an @sshole.
3. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with.
4. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.
5. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.
6. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.
7.. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.
8. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.
9. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.
10. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.
11. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease.
12. Karmageddon: It's when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, and then the Earth explodes, and it's a serious bummer.
13. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you
14. Glibido: All talk and no action.
15. Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.
16. Arachnoleptic fit (n.):The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.
17. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito, that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.
18. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a worm in the fruit you're eating.
The Washington Post has also published the winning submissions to its yearly contest, in which readers are asked to supply alternate meanings for common words.
And the winners are:
1. coffee, n. the person upon whom one coughs.
2. flabbergasted, adj.appalled by discovering how much weight one has gained.
3. abdicate, v. to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.
4. esplanade, v. to attempt an explanation while drunk.
5. willy-nilly, adj. impotent.
6. negligent, adj.absentmindedly answering the door when wearing only a nightgown.
7.. lymph, v. to walk with a lisp.
8. gargoyle, n. olive-flavored mouthwash.
9. flatulence, n. emergency vehicle that picks up someone who has been run over by a steamroller.
10. balderdash, n. a rapidly receding hairline.
11. testicle, n. a humorous question on an exam.
12. rectitude, n. the formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists.
13. pokemon, n. a Rastafarian proctologist.
14. oyster, n. a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddishisms.
15. Frisbeetarianism, n. the belief that, after death, the soul flies up onto the roof and gets stuck there.
16. circumvent, n. an opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by Jewish men.
Monday, September 15, 2008
The Pigman's Thoughts Turn to Football
Random thought-age: Cool guy beats nerd-geek. Earth Wind & Fire, song inspiring. That's the way, of the world..... A true man, defined as one male not wearing a white starched Oxford donning gray tie and red sweater vest, can still count on that one ounce of prevention in a Trojan, to prevent another pound of Buckeye. Pray tell: Why does 'Gym Tressel' dress like a midtown CPA? Surely to got, he must realize that when the Village People reunite, they'll ask for their uniform back as they manwhoremoaniously sing: 'YMCPA'. For all his program's bucks paid out, and the dotted eyes - amist - and the for-real tease........Ohio Shate simply - Sucks. And when, for Pete's sake, will USC quit Carrolling and begin paying pennance for past transgressions following (wishful-thinking) microscopic NCAA investigation? You'll find me at mass tomorrow praying for forgivness. And praying for the multiple UofK high-ankle-sprains to heal before the SEC opens up - like the Buckeye's collective sphinter did today. File under WT: ......Auburn hires offensive coordinator, and CYA Author, Tony Franklin, formerly Highly-Offenisve coordinator under "Hal 'Cheatin' MoFo' Mumme", who put up GI-Normicious numbers for the Univeristy of KENTUCKY - back in their 'hey' day........yet, the Plainsmen get tres ....and bequeath old Mississippi State .. dos?WTF? & BTW: The missing letter to that mathematical equation three/two, is summed up in one letter/word = 'D'. I'm a big fan of Sylvester Croom. We all should be. Darn it, America should be. After coach Brooks bolts, I'd love to have him in Lexington; although I know his heart is only there temporarily. Great Coach, better human.Yeah, he belongs in Tuscaloosa. I have alot of respect for Alabama from the perspective of bringing home their own. Saban may do something for 'em; but he's not an Alabama grad (is that an oxymoron?).Hey, Alabama brought the Bear out of the wood (KENTUCKY) - and to the back wood along the banks of the Black Warrior River, home to rule the roost and all men's man caveage. Saban is a job whore - Vegas- like- akin to Bobby Petrino. Whereas, Croom is loyal. There is alot to be said about homeboyage and voyage. The ship sooner or later sails home. Ciao main. topher_85
Labels:
The Sporting Life,
Voice of the Pigman
Monday, September 1, 2008
Red, White and Blue make......what?
Red, white and Blue make...what?
'Green', is a word - you learn early; it is Crayola.
Somehow, that word, Green.....has revamped itself.
Can we do the same with the N word, and why has that taken so long?
Used to......Green meant you were green....inexperienced. Total shclock....LOSER...learning the ropes.
Now, due to marketing gurus, that are, again, about 100 phuckin' years late on this program....
The G word equates to cool.And, green means business. AL Gore is a dufus.
But, green means.......change. Which starts at home. Which means sales.
I believe the word green should really be called, "American Indian tearful and canoe-ing down a trash filled river".
That's Green.
Ciao main.
Bebo
'Green', is a word - you learn early; it is Crayola.
Somehow, that word, Green.....has revamped itself.
Can we do the same with the N word, and why has that taken so long?
Used to......Green meant you were green....inexperienced. Total shclock....LOSER...learning the ropes.
Now, due to marketing gurus, that are, again, about 100 phuckin' years late on this program....
The G word equates to cool.And, green means business. AL Gore is a dufus.
But, green means.......change. Which starts at home. Which means sales.
I believe the word green should really be called, "American Indian tearful and canoe-ing down a trash filled river".
That's Green.
Ciao main.
Bebo
Labels:
Greenery,
Politics,
Voice of the Pigman
Saturday, August 30, 2008
McCain Selects His Vice President
Methinkith..........McAnus forgot the 7 P's.
Prior proper preparation prevents piss poor performance.
This is a Republican disaster.And, they don't need 'Her-ick-a-knee' named ' Gustave', to rain on their parade. McAnus has already pissed on it. McAnus went and blew it. Blew it more fierce than Gustave's winds the Republicans feared Fox would rather cover (no way Rupert would allow that).He dissed Romney (whose name sounds like an old 70s shoe by Addidas) - and the Huckster. Even dissed Hillary by comparing Pallin's inexperience - and Hillary's experience. Say what?
It boils down to this: Life Insurance.
He has some policies I don't care for; but he's risking leaving us, the US, with no policy. Brilliant? Hardly - this will go down historically as a bold and calculated attempt to attract Hillary Dems, et al. And, she will probably persuade folks to let us drill in Alaska for oil. (BTW, the supreme court decision to lessen Exxon's damages over Valdeez was simply WRONG).But his choice for VP, it flies in face of logic. The man is 72, had several bouts with cancer, and is ready to stroke out any minute. He has failed already at the most important issue which is the mitigation of the risk of his coding. The starving masses need worthy leftovers.
A vote for McAnus is NOT worth the risk of an inexperienced anybody taking the helm (man, woman.... red, yellow, black or white or whit-etc).They say Obama lacks experience; compare his Senate experience to her political experience.
If Obama ascends to the pearly gates, we got Biden. If McAnus gets burried 6 foot under, ashes to ashes, we got her?
No thanks.
Ciao for now.
bEBo
Labels:
Politics,
Voice of the Pigman
Sunday, August 10, 2008
Pigman Takes on Edwards
Just in case NUN o'u whole moe's don't seek bloggage. And note: There is never a mind of mine to mine. Its all about toast.
I may shake like a 6.9, but my column is always a mouthful.
Kornfucious say: seek progress, not perfection......for you will find first in roots, not dyed, the latter in chase.
Frogs....It is a sad day when a shtupid asshh mofo runs for El Presidente........while he's cheating - on his brilliant-smart-lawyer-wife...who just happens to be suffering from BREAST CANCER!!!! Eee Dee IT. If there is ever a candidate for the award, "You SUCK, and should die,..." it'd be him. Ignorant MOFO = him.
Sorry about my Passionate- French: But, holy cow -what an ass whole. POS complete. Flushable. Delete from historical memory, fool.
And, I ain't judgin' here. But I am sayin'.
Between this one and the one who recently supported his wife's run, for El Presidente, post experience in ARK, USA, and impeachment - cheatin' sunny beach- why, why - would anyone vote for John Mc Anus? Mc Anus did the exact same thing....which is......cheated on his FIRST WIFE!
Pete Rose was not the first one to cheat on a wife....or Baseball...or on his fellow AMERICANS.
Err' one of these type has the Joe Thiesman syndrome.
Just lucky enough that their mom's chute was big enough to birth such a big ass head without Guiness World Record Author there to substantiate the event.
This country needs somthing fresh.....like LOYALTY....ACCOUNTABILITY.......
If, and say this like a "BEARS" fan........if Buh RACK....O'BAMA.......frocks up.....and I don't think he will......we, as a country are not only economically in piss poor shape...but we are in that world of hurt that even the GW WWIII DID NOT HELP US escape.
So, what is next?
U freakers tell me!
Now that I've knife-laden the sandwich bread with my jelly.....here's the 'speaking of which' non-peanut butter, which makes it a think-wich: http://www.ireport.com/docs/DOC-57943
Pax vobiscum.
Bebo
I may shake like a 6.9, but my column is always a mouthful.
Kornfucious say: seek progress, not perfection......for you will find first in roots, not dyed, the latter in chase.
Frogs....It is a sad day when a shtupid asshh mofo runs for El Presidente........while he's cheating - on his brilliant-smart-lawyer-wife...who just happens to be suffering from BREAST CANCER!!!! Eee Dee IT. If there is ever a candidate for the award, "You SUCK, and should die,..." it'd be him. Ignorant MOFO = him.
Sorry about my Passionate- French: But, holy cow -what an ass whole. POS complete. Flushable. Delete from historical memory, fool.
And, I ain't judgin' here. But I am sayin'.
Between this one and the one who recently supported his wife's run, for El Presidente, post experience in ARK, USA, and impeachment - cheatin' sunny beach- why, why - would anyone vote for John Mc Anus? Mc Anus did the exact same thing....which is......cheated on his FIRST WIFE!
Pete Rose was not the first one to cheat on a wife....or Baseball...or on his fellow AMERICANS.
Err' one of these type has the Joe Thiesman syndrome.
Just lucky enough that their mom's chute was big enough to birth such a big ass head without Guiness World Record Author there to substantiate the event.
This country needs somthing fresh.....like LOYALTY....ACCOUNTABILITY.......
If, and say this like a "BEARS" fan........if Buh RACK....O'BAMA.......frocks up.....and I don't think he will......we, as a country are not only economically in piss poor shape...but we are in that world of hurt that even the GW WWIII DID NOT HELP US escape.
So, what is next?
U freakers tell me!
Now that I've knife-laden the sandwich bread with my jelly.....here's the 'speaking of which' non-peanut butter, which makes it a think-wich: http://www.ireport.com/docs/DOC-57943
Pax vobiscum.
Bebo
Labels:
Voice of the Pigman
Tuesday, August 5, 2008
Car Companies and BIG AWL pt 2
There was a great article in Bz Wk, last issue. There is this guy. Named Farley. Looks similar to his 1st cuz, Chris. Only, he is the smart one.
Any way, Ford has their work cut out for them. Farley was hired away from Toyota (dumb arses didn't put in a thall shalt non-compete clause).
Ford's problems are heavy......but simple.
First, the failed to recognize a couple of things.
1) gas prices going up
2) lack of cars that get good gas mileage
3) unions
4) unions
5) see number 1).....
6) see number 2)
7) if you've done nothing to address any of the aforementioned in the past 8 years, you are a LOSER......I mean a FORD.
But Farley doesn't hit the pavement Hizzy-sheet-asz-pantz screaming, "......live in a van down by the river'.
He is calculated. Brilliant-Smart.
The article did not lead into product. It intimated. A road. Beyond Day Traw.
But to keep alive, you know where Ford is going.
To a Ford lover, it is time to BUY.
BUY now, and BUY more.
Did I say BUY?
Yip!
If you do, I would put down a couple thou b/c I believe this Farley will breath his and his cousins life into saving this company.
"Do the Henry"
Ciao main.
Bebo
Any way, Ford has their work cut out for them. Farley was hired away from Toyota (dumb arses didn't put in a thall shalt non-compete clause).
Ford's problems are heavy......but simple.
First, the failed to recognize a couple of things.
1) gas prices going up
2) lack of cars that get good gas mileage
3) unions
4) unions
5) see number 1).....
6) see number 2)
7) if you've done nothing to address any of the aforementioned in the past 8 years, you are a LOSER......I mean a FORD.
But Farley doesn't hit the pavement Hizzy-sheet-asz-pantz screaming, "......live in a van down by the river'.
He is calculated. Brilliant-Smart.
The article did not lead into product. It intimated. A road. Beyond Day Traw.
But to keep alive, you know where Ford is going.
To a Ford lover, it is time to BUY.
BUY now, and BUY more.
Did I say BUY?
Yip!
If you do, I would put down a couple thou b/c I believe this Farley will breath his and his cousins life into saving this company.
"Do the Henry"
Ciao main.
Bebo
Labels:
Voice of the Pigman
Bebo Speaks...
Hey man! This is probably bloggage.....bloggable.......only.... Its a use it or lose it. I'm not gonna remember it later. Alot of what comes in......leaves courtesy of a $63.63 check ever twelve weeks to transport away from the Store Ship Enterprise. If you want, use some, post it, what not.....but cite your authority -and move on. Ciao main.
p.s. Monday, a week ago, I dropped my progeny off at a day camp and as I squeezed into the big parking spot I thought I'd left, apparently some dyed blonde parked so close to me that as I squeezed my fat ash into my tiny ride......
I banged my short leg on the console of Rhonda, the FIT. I truly thought I'd broke the Fibula or Tibia. And, I may have. I live with a very high threshold for pain; and self medicate.So, yesterday, my wife took my progeny to the pool for 2 hours; I jammed with my band......Walk Man. I felt every bass drum pound. Each one. And, I fought through the pain.
Because......I'd self medicate. There is a song in there somewhere. But, when I roll over in bed, it hurts too. The past week on the sleep mattress....this wknd in Bhm, on a leakingair mattress....not only was the crack in my leg hurting but the crack in my ash.....this is another story I won't go into (familia). So when I drum, its because I need it. And, it was good. It usually is ........fun. Ciao main. Gonna watch 'Jeauneau' (Can I have a vowel, Pat, you puhtard?). -----
p.s. Monday, a week ago, I dropped my progeny off at a day camp and as I squeezed into the big parking spot I thought I'd left, apparently some dyed blonde parked so close to me that as I squeezed my fat ash into my tiny ride......
I banged my short leg on the console of Rhonda, the FIT. I truly thought I'd broke the Fibula or Tibia. And, I may have. I live with a very high threshold for pain; and self medicate.So, yesterday, my wife took my progeny to the pool for 2 hours; I jammed with my band......Walk Man. I felt every bass drum pound. Each one. And, I fought through the pain.
Because......I'd self medicate. There is a song in there somewhere. But, when I roll over in bed, it hurts too. The past week on the sleep mattress....this wknd in Bhm, on a leakingair mattress....not only was the crack in my leg hurting but the crack in my ash.....this is another story I won't go into (familia). So when I drum, its because I need it. And, it was good. It usually is ........fun. Ciao main. Gonna watch 'Jeauneau' (Can I have a vowel, Pat, you puhtard?). -----
Labels:
Voice of the Pigman
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D I Y
Start where you are...
Use what you have...
Become the change that you want to see in the world.
Enough for Everyone's Need, Not for Everyone's Greed...
Live simply so that others may simply live.
Become the Media
Don't listen to the one-sided corporate-owned media. They are not in the business of finding the truth. They are only concerned about making money for themselves and their stock holders. If they do report the truth, it is only because it suits their business plan. A happy accident...
Become the media! Blog it, film it, record it...
You still have credibility... They don't.